You Just Can’t get Me out of Your Head
People often ask Me if I have always been dominant. Perhaps surprisingly, the answer isn’t completely straightforward. My tastes ran to the subversive and the taboo even before I was the London Mistress I am today. But My true nature as a Mistress was revealed to Me over time, unlocked through several vivid experiences.
One of these experiences involved an early experimentation with chastity. I’d yet to discover the pleasures of more formal training, but had told a lover that I liked the idea of controlling his orgasms. Over time, this evolved into his requiring My permission for release, which meant he’d often send desperate, horny little messages to that effect. My answer was all too often ‘no’ (accompanied with an evil giggle), but occasionally I’d grant him permission out of the blue, often when I knew he was in meetings. He’d tell Me after that he’d been rendered completely unable to concentrate, consumed with thoughts of doing exactly as he was told. I was, he said, living rent free in his head.
And just like that, a new obsession with the more psychological elements of domination was born, one which I have been erotically preoccupied with ever since. So much so that, during My time at the helm of the London Dominatrix School, I introduced psychology into the syllabus.
But what do I mean by psychological domination? Undoubtedly it means many things to many different people, but for Me, it’s about mental exploration and surrender. It’s distinct from play that’s primarily centred around physical sensations (whether that’s pleasure or pain), and instead focuses on our thoughts, beliefs and fantasies.
In short, it’s about power exchange that takes place first and foremost in the mind. As a result, it can be a potent and profound experience for Us/us both, and something that excites Me deeply.
After many years of exploring every aspect of domination (and despite still enjoying a little brute force every now and again), I find Myself drawn to psychological domination for the intense connection it enables Me to build with My submissives. It is, after all, deeply intimate to let Me into your head in this way, to allow Me to play in the shallows of your subconscious.
And how exactly do I play with it? Well, how long is a piece of jute rope? Some of My favourite ways to exert psychological control include hypnosis, chastity, erotic humiliation, feminisation – all of which are characterised by a delicious surrender of My sub’s ego to My will. I may be a London Mistress, but sometimes this control will extend beyond the dungeon door and across the city, through tasks, confessions or long distance protocols. Anything to keep Me in your mind and bending to My will at a moment’s notice.
I also have a lifelong obsession with roleplay, precisely because it provides a space in which to stage psychologically complex and subversive desires. My particular kinks have always revolved around playing with power differentials and cultural taboos – chastity, consensual non consent, objectification – anything which makes Me feel like a devilish wolf in sheep’s clothing, or a corruptor of innocence.
Through roleplay, I create a safe and accepting space for My submissives to give voice to the sides of their desire that they may feel shame or anxiety about. They can explore roles and identities that may be at odds with their everyday lives, or they can confront negative or stigmatised ideas about their body or their masculinity and reclaim them as arousing. These ideas have such a huge erotic charge precisely because they can be so emotionally loaded, and roleplay provides a vital stage in which to harness these tensions for pleasure. The thrill is, as Ann McClintock writes, “playing power backwards”.
All of which is to say: psychological domination can be an experience like no other – a form of fantasy that expands reality. Perhaps this is exactly what you need. Let Me take you under My control. You may find you never want to leave.
Desperate for more? There’s many more ‘Confessions of a London Mistress’ to come.
